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If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

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After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.
Write injuries in sand, kindnesses in marble.
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.
Welcome refugees!
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
Friends are something that everybody needs, if you want to have you need to work.
"The love we give away is the only love we keep." Elbert Hubbard
Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love. (Mother Teresa)
Life is not meant to be easy, it’s meant to be lived. Some times happy, other times rough … but with every up and down you learn lessons that make you strong.
I love you with all my heart, and forever.
The problems that exist in the world today cannot be solved by the level of thinking that created them.
We have enough gun control, what we need is idiot control.
Girls are funny creatures. They hate it when you ask their age but will kill you if you forget their birthday.
Refugees are human beings!
Love is something which binds us to care for someone.
I just hate the way people just try to play with other people’s emotions.
"Eighty percent of success is showing up." Woody Allen
After women, flower are the most lovely thing God has given the world.